The phone has been ringing a lot today. I’m a life coach and I know this will happen. I took the day off to bake and make chocolate covered orange peels and reflect. But people I know are sad. Some are desperate. They call to tell me life is not what it is supposed to be. Some are angry at their lot in life, some are unspeakably sad. I cannot
Image by peachfizzy
fix those lives, but I listen and nod. I do not respond with a story from my life. I do not offer advice. I do not tell them I know how they feel. They have enough trouble dealing with their own life. And I don’t know how they feel, not really.
There is a lot of fear around that Christmas tree. A lot of disappointment in those presents. A lot of inadequacy in the stockings. You didn’t get what you wanted. It wasn’t under the tree, it’s not in your life. Your relatives make mean remarks, and you wish you were alone. Or you are alone and wish you had a loud noisy family to keep you company.
Christmas is not merry for all. For those of you for whom it is merry, you probably aren’t reading blogs on Christmas Day. For those of you who are sad or alone, gather here and know someone in cyberspace is listening to your loneliness. I am sitting with you in silence, making a space on the bench for you. I don’t have an answer, a good solution to your problem, a way to cheer you up. But for right this minute, I will sit with you and keep you company in your silence.
–Quinn McDonald remembers what her mother said in anger, but turned out to be true: “You’d better learn to love being alone, you’ll spend the unhappiest hours of your life there.”
I love the blog – so evocative of our urban (and not so urban) schizophrenia. The feeling of inadequacy when giving gifts to those who have too much and trauma of receiving presents resulting as a result of random acts of shopping always get to me.
Lovely, quiet bench…..and a listening ear. Thanks for this post, Quinn.
Susan
You are welcome. It was pretty crowded this year.
I love your generous spirit. This really can be a challenging time of year and the offer to ease the suffering or loneliness of others is a great gift.
Thanks, Tonia. It’s good to create a small clearing and invite people to sit. It’s a comfort.
Let me join you on the bench. All I want is to just be there, in silence with my own thoughts.
Plenty of room. And plenty of company, in comfortable silence.
Promise me you’ll always remember: You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. Christopher Robin to Pooh
Thanks, Traci. That’s a good quote for all of us.
But my thoughts are with those who are sad — I”m a bit bittersweet not to be with one of my favorite people today. May you all know peace soon….
The wheel turns and sooner or later we have a horrible lonely Christmas. Thanks for coming and sitting on the bench.
Mine is merry and I read blogs on Christmas day. Why let Christmas interfere with my life? ;^)
My family sits around interacting by sharing stuff on our computers. Yes, we’re geeks… ;^)
Merry Christmas to you, Donna. Share it any way you like!
You can see a big blue sky, bright oranges, vibrant lemons. And if you look into the pool, you can see the reflection of the desert.
I could use a bit of a break – can I sit on your bench with you? Can I see the desert from there?