My head may spin off my neck and roll on the floor. I write clearly. I write clear emails. All questions come at the end of the email. So why do people to whom I send clear emails with questions at the end not answer the question? I would not mind if I were told, “I don’t know.” But that doesn’t happen. This does:
This is your brain on emails.
A friend decides to sell his books. He puts them on Bookmooch. This is a kind act. I follow the link, I mooch a book, a pop-up tells me I have to join bookmooch, followed by more pop-ups of confirmation, redirection and finally, a pop-up that tells me I don’t have enough points. No explanation. I write friend, summarize above, ask how to mooch a certain book. Do I get an answer that tells me how to get a book on the list? Nope. The return email says, “Bookmooch is great. You should get rid of your extras there, too.” Well, I won’t have any extras if I can’t get them. And now, of course, I have an account with a place I don’t want an account with.
Move on. I’m supposed to be interviewed on a radio show. I want to know three things: what date, what time, what place? (We’d agreed on the topic already.) My email said, “Please confirm date, time and location for interview.” Eight words. It took five email exchanges to get all the information.
Today I get an email about the interview that is so garbled I think it’s written by a cat chasing a bug across the keyboard. It is punctuated with random strings of dots and hyphens, and either someone will be sitting on my lap during the interview, or two people are booked at the same time. It’s not clear. Oh, and the topic has been changed to art therapy (I’m not an art therapist) And I’m supposed to “bring cards for their groups.” I have no idea to what or whom “their” refers to. Or the cards, which may or may not be business cards.
If this happened once or twice a year, I wouldn’t mind. But this happens frequently. Four or more times a week. It proves that multi-tasking doesn’t work nearly as well as you think it does. If you are driving, please don’t email me. If you are on the phone, please don’t email me. Please, by the sun god Ra, read the email I sent you, think it through, then answer the question I asked. Otherwise, I’ll send you a Tweetpix of my head rolling on the floor after it has popped off.
–Quinn McDonald is banging her head on her desk, thinking of the time she wastes sending emails only to have to follow up with a phone call, just to get an answer.
Oh Quinn! I had to laugh. I tried really hard not to but I just couldn’t hold it in. Boy, do I ever identify! It’s crazy making! I have gotten to where I literally bullet point questions or number them, double spaced, thinking it will be easier for people.
I encourage snorting laughter. I think it’s good for the soul.
Funny post! Oh, that’s happened to me as well, so many times.
As far as Bookmooch is concerned, your friend is right it is great, but you have to first put up your own books that you want to get rid of in your inventory. When someone mooches them, you send them off to them. If they’re in the US you get one point. If they’re in another country, you get three points. Which you can then use to trade for someone else’s books. It’s actually pretty cool, but obviously it needs a bit of a better explanation somewhere.
I’ve given up on Bookmooch, Google Groups, and a zillion more things. You can’t be there for everyone.
Gees…If you get a person to answer your phone call follow-up consider yourself ahead of the game.
I personally wouldn’t consider myself ahead of the game because someone answers my phone call or email, that’s just common decency and respect. It’s one thing if it’s an annoying salesperson but that’s not the case in these instances that Quinn is describing.
Common decency and respect isn’t so common any more. Which was my point.
Seriously, it takes a visit in person to get an answer nowadays!
Yes, I’ve just had one of those one-sided conversations. Three times I explained something in very simple words, twice an email comes back with the same question that I just answered. I even grabbed a passing friend so I could be sure that I could still make myself understood and my sanity wasn’t slipping away!
You aren’t nuts. People just aren’t concentrating or focusing anymore.
Quinn – I agree that this is the problem. We’re suffering from permanent damage due to information overload and so people have forgotten the basics of common decency and communication which should be at the heart of good communication
It’s so true. Communication just isn’t what it used to be.
I hear you about the emails! Technology really slows us down and makes common courtesy an afterthought!!!
On another note, Thanks for stopping by my blog and taking time to leave me a comment! I truly appreciate it
Technology made that possible, too, Smitha!
I really enjoyed this post. Last summer I began working closely with a professor. I ask “do you want a or b?” His answer: “yes.” After headbanging, I try again. I have learned that most people do not read to the end of e-mail messages–they read until they think they have the gist and stop. I’ve learned to place questions at the beginning and I’ve also learned to only put one question per message. Two at most. I can ask more questions but they won’t get answered anyway and I’m the one who will be frustrated.
People do read the last line in an email and then answer. It makes me stick all my questions in twice–once on top and once at the bottom.
I was literally crying with laughter reading this post. I’m sorry that you’ve had such frustration but I love your spin on it. I love the quote, “I think it’s written by a cat chasing a bug across the keyboard.” Too funny!
It is truly amazing that people seem to not even read what they are sent. It’s certainly not something I can wrap my head around since it’s not the way I operate but I’ve dealt with my fair share. But I think you have a magnet for this stuff because the “gremlins” seem to like you better.
I would also like to be sent the photo of your head rolling. Hang in there!
Thank you for making me laugh out loud about what I believe is a serious problem in our society. I have labeled it as non-responsive behavior that is aloud to roam freely behind the shield of the internet. We avoid both face-to-face and voice-to-voice contact. We can all get “credit” for posting, replying, or texting without saying anything or answering the relevant question(s).
Quinn, when you mail out or post the head rolling on the floor photo, please add my name to the list. A most wonderful belly laugh for this morning as I read this bit. The frustrating follow the maze process with getting connected to some sites is what sends me packing from them for good. Although, sometimes they do not get the message and just keep on communicating with me.
Thanks for your every day enjoyable visit to my home.
Kristin
a cat chasing a bug across the keyboard — love it. I totally get your frustration. I have gone to putting bullet points in my emails under the guise of “I know you are busy…blah, blah,blah.” All I really want are answers. I feel for you.
Yes, multi failing. I fear it’s catching on. The same thing happens to me and the back and forth required to get the information is frustrating.
hey quinn could you post that pic of your head rolling across the floor, please? i’d like to have it just so i’d know my head is not alone rolling across my floor… and thanks for the giggle! vicki
I’ve encountered the same “date, time, location” issue, but a bit differently. Designing software that (in part) schedules meetings runs into the problem, which I think may be partly due to individual differences in categorizing things. The logical approach is, of course, to have three categories (fields), each of which accepts a particular kind of information.
But many people behave as if they don’t make those categorical discriminations, at least not easily. (I don’t know anything about their internal states; all I have to go on is what they do and say.) If you don’t provide tools to help the right information go into the right categories, and to help make sure everything is filled in, the poor stupid computer will be at a loss as to what to do. This can happen surprisingly often.
Nowadays when you enter an appointment into a computer, you usually have little gadgets to use to pick a day, a time, etc. That’s why.
So here’s an idea: what if you have a calendar on the web somewhere (Google calendar is a pretty good one) and you let other people add to it? Instead of sending a question in email, just send a link and say “schedule a meeting on my calendar.” You can block out days as you need to.
One of the reason I’m a freelancer, is because my calendar is proprietary. No one can add meetings to it. When I was in the corporate world, I got lots of meeting parked on my calendar–and often moved. Not enough information to let me know what the meetings were for–but that’s another thing.
I think everybody’s calendar is proprietary; when you come right down to it about all you have is your own time and attention. The calendar I use for communication is not THE calendar; it’s a more structured form of email. Adding something is a “request”, and it has to be well formed rather than “sometime next week”.
I like the specific request idea. That would work for me, too.