Choosing Change

Chrysalis from caterpillar is programmed by destiny to spin a cocoon and emerge a butterfly. No one knows if the caterpillar is aware of what happens during the process. No one knows if the butterfly remembers being a caterpillar.

People are different. We don’t spin a cocoon to change, we choose a harder way–small steps every day. We change because we keep choosing two, day by day, decision by decision.

It is hard, making the choice to change. It means we deliberately give up one thing to choose another, often unknown.  It means we risk losing friends who don’t want to get to know us all over again in our new forms. We don’t demand that they choose with us, but they must to remain with us as we change. Some friends will turn around or branch off. That is there decision. We can’t control it. The choice between controlling our own lives and not controlling others’ lives is a struggle.

But some of us choose to move to a new place and start a life over. We choose to forgive bad parenting, and accept what we did get, and thrive despite of it. We choose to leave a job that pays well but doesn’t meet our values. We choose to stay or leave, because either is a choice.

Our transformations are as amazing as a caterpillar’s. For all of us who have surivived, who have chosen to heal ourselves, to push into growth,  to keep going no matter how hard, we have chosen a life of growth and transformation. We know change is possible and sustainable. Sometimes it’s a secret. Sometimes we reinvent ourselves several times. We can be more than one person in a lifetime, and we can celebrate each life we choose.
–Quinn McDonald is a certified creativity coach and an artist. See her work at