Today’s post is written by entrepreneur Glenda Waterworth (she and her husband own and run the stamp shop Chocolate Baroque, in England). When she told me about her take on extreme self care, I knew I had to share her ideas (and her art journal) with you.
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The last couple of years have been “difficult” for my husband and me. That’s an understatement, but that’s what I do – I put a brave face on it, smile and tell everyone I’m coping just fine. The reality would take too long to go into, but let’s just say it’s been a time of endings and loss and deep emotional pain.
I look back on the worst of that time now and see it as a storm. We had to turn and face into the wind with our heads down, battling against the obstacles churned up and thrown at us. During the storm, all you want is for it to stop. You think your problems will be over when the storm ends, but what actually happens is that the storm unearths and uproots anything that isn’t securely nailed down.
For me, the debris that was left in the wake of our storm – the issues I hadn’t previously “nailed down” turned out to be my own health. I was so busy being the tower of strength for those around me that I had neglected my own physical health and once exposed, it demanded attention.
I have lots of journals on the go, most without a specific theme, but this January I started a “health” journal and stuck in the words “Healthy, strong and active” as one of my goals for 2012. The journal then sat around for months, untouched.
In April I went through a few weeks of intense pain that eventually resulted in me being given a shot of morphine and admitted to hospital.
I disagreed with the doctor’s preliminary diagnosis and discharged myself rather than go through a battery of tests that I just didn’t believe was right. My own doctor ran some simpler tests to rule out the biggies (cancer) and encouraged me not to cancel our forthcoming holiday.
So a few days later I endured a grueling 400 mile, two day journey to northern Scotland for our first proper holiday in five years and it was there that my real healing began. I rested and reveled in the silence and wild beauty and wrote in my journal about banishing pain from my body.
We drove to remote, windswept beaches and I would load up with painkillers and heat pads and walk as far as I could manage, even if it was just a few minutes.
Ten days into the holiday I woke up without pain for the first time in about five weeks. I wrote about that too, wanting to capture the feeling of ordinariness and the gratitude for it.
I apologized to my body and promised to look after it better in the future. I made a commitment to practice “extreme self care”.
When I got home, I came across my health journal and I realised the word ‘health’ was limiting and had been holding me back from using this journal. I now call it my Extreme Self Care journal which covers so much more than physical health, though obviously that is a key part of the mix.
Based on some of the writing I had done on holiday, I wrote the mission statement. (Above, left).
I then revisited my ‘healthy strong and active’ page with a favourite journaling technique:
Hold a question, problem or a phrase (as in this case) in your mind then harvest old magazines for words and phrases that call out to you.
Cut them out and put them all onto a large clean piece of paper. Play around with them and see what words come together, what sentences you can form.
Sometimes I find words that I incorporate with my own writing, using the cut out words for emphasis, and that is what I did here to document my experience of fighting pain.
Other times I make a whole sentence from the words such as this example here. I may add my own writing or images to this page later –picking up on phrases that resonate at the time.
As 2012 draws to a close, we know that our storm is over and the bruises are healing, there’s still a little debris to tidy up, but now we can see we are facing a new landscape, washed clean and full of possibilities. Extreme self care is now part of my life and my mindset and the journal, like me, is a work in progress.
—Glenda Waterworth describes herself as “not perfect, never finished, always experimenting and endlessly curious”. A desire for a more colourful life led her to quit her career in computing in her mid 30s and start her own creative business. She now runs a stamp company called Chocolate Baroque from the historic market town of Barnard Castle in England with her husband, Adrian.
[Quinn’s note: Visit Glenda’s blog and her online stamp company and you’ll see that’s she’s another art instigator.]
19 thoughts on “Extreme Self Care (Guest Post)”
So glad to read that things are improving for you both Glenda… this is a wonderful piece of work and very inspiring for those in need.
Well done for getting it all down on paper (which is always hard to do). Hope to see you again in this delightful place called the HIghlands…I know my soul would not be happy if I/we were not to live here. Much love Cynthia x
Hello. This was one of the most valuable, meaningful, and timely things I have ever read. Thank you so much, Glenda.
You’re welcome Dorothy – funny how a lot of people have found the post timely. There’s never a better time than now to honour your body.
The art journal pages are beautiful Glenda, and so is the message behind them!
Thank you – the real beauty is in honouring the words, making good on those promises to myself.
What a wonderful post Glenda. . . and timely for me too. It’s continued a stream of thought that Quinn fired up in me a few days ago. Thanks
I think Quinn is very good at that! If it has been thought provoking for you, then I hope you find the insight you need.
What a beautiful post. I think if everyone paid better attention to their body, mind, and spirit, there would be much more joy in the world!
I couldn’t agree more Hilary. I’ve come to realise that taking care of your body is not vain or selfish – the most selfish thing is to ignore your body and tune out it’s messages to you. It will make itself heard in the end!
Wow! Glenda, you’ve blown me away with your blog. I, too, have dealt with illness and extreme pain, much of it emotionally charged and caused. Finding that Harbour for mind, body, and soul is simply imperative. I’m so happy for you, that you’ve found yours. My ultimate “peaceful place” is a lake in Vermont, where my Grandfather had a cottage. We vacationed there every summer when I was a kid. Now, when I’m stressed, or in pain, or sad, I go there (in my head) and lie on my belly, on the dock, looking at the little fishes swimming down below. I think we all need those peaceful places. I know my blood pressure drops at least 10 points when I go there!
Thanks Susannah, it is good to have a place to go and thanks to my holiday I have reminders (photos, paintings and journals) of the deep peace that I found in Scotland this year. I like the sound of your lake – I grew up in a beautiful area of northern England called the Lake District!
Wonderful post – Love the title of the journal…extreme self care, perfect words for my journey, right where I am today. The story gave several opportunities for the aha, yep, I know that feeling, experience, place in time and space. Glenda is a wonderful, inspiring creative; thank you for sharing her words and work with us today, Quinn.
Thank you Kristin – knowing even one person had that ‘aha’ feeling is great and I hope you find something to inspire your own extreme self care.
Thank you Glenda for sharing this I will try to take a leaf out of your book so to speak. You are always inspirational.
Thank you Sue – I’m guessing by the Anonymous name which Sue you are, and all I can say is hang in there – I know what pain you are going through right now and you have the strength to deal with it, I know you do.
This is lovely – extreme self care. An exquisite combination of words. It’s really the basis for everything, isn’t it? Without a strong foundation, the building is unstable. And your journal is an inspiration, too. Thank you, Glenda, for such an honest recounting of one of the practices I find most difficult.
You’re welcome Bo – I still find it difficult too, but that’s where the journal comes into its own.
I’ll add my thanks to Glenda here – a real encourager throughout her own pain I’ve had the privilege of being at the receiving end of her on-line classes which have given me the tools with which to express myself.
And do you know how much it nourishes my soul Paula to see a student flourishing? You couldn’t give a teacher a better gift so thank *you*.